Hi, my name is Rebecca, and I'm currently learning how to run.
Or relearning how to run, I suppose.
I started running in 2013 and made a lot of progress over the first few years. It seemed that every month I was able to run faster and farther than before. Then everything started going down hill in 2016. My depression and anxiety spiraled out of control and I got injured while training for my first marathon but insisted on continuing my training and running the race. I started getting slower. Then last year, shortly before my second marathon, I started to hate running because it was yet another area of my life in which I felt like a failure. I was once again hurting, and I was angry at myself and felt defeated, and I was jealous of those around me who were thriving while I was struggling.
I ended up missing several races this year due to either illness or anxiety, but then things started looking up as I ran a couple of 5k races with friends who were new to running. Having another person there was not only motivating, but it also helped me remember that running could be fun.
I was running again. Or at least trying to run again. Many times my runs turned into walks, as my fitness level is no where near where it used to be.
Then last weekend, I went out to watch part of the Chicago marathon. I've never had the opportunity to spectate a race before, and it was amazing. I decided that it was time for me to recommit to running. I signed up for a Turkey Trot that day and began a 5k training program the following morning (Zombies, Run! 5k Training - the same 5k training app I used when I decided to run my first race 5 years ago).
So here I am, relearning how to run. I'm taking things slowly and trying not to think about the past, the successes or the failures. Instead, I'm just trying to keep moving forward and putting one foot in front of the other.